Omar
Minwalla took on a highly sensitive topic in this chapter. The discovery that a partner is a sex addict
can be a traumatic event for the partner.
Sometimes the reactions apparently can parallel those of someone who has
been brutally raped. At the very least any self-doubt, particularly about one’s
sexuality, becomes a primary concern.
I was wondering
how to address such a sensitive topic and it came to me during a meditation. My
best ideas often do when I am trying not to get caught up in my thinking during
meditation. Probably the ideas occur
because I have suspended my self-criticism
At first Omar
Minwalla’s examples of the effect on a partner’s sexuality of acknowledging the
sex addict’s behavior seemed to be “over the top”. But what he did was
articulate many of the reactions the partners of sex addicts have. Making these
reactions so explicit must make these issues more “normal’ for the
partner. Therefore, the awareness of
issues can contribute to the work of healing.
One of the keys
to any intimate relationship is trust.
Each partner makes him or herself vulnerable by acknowledging the other
person’s importance. Healing enough to
tolerate and risk the possibility of the other person's rejection or betrayal
is no easy task in the context of one partner’s sexual addiction and/or the
other person's rage at the betrayal.
No comments:
Post a Comment